Missing something

This may seem completely random but I am just in one of those random moods.

I don't know what but something is missing....

I have this crazy emptiness inside of me and feel so vulnerable all the time

I have so many wants and needs and feel like they are so far out of my reach and it leaves me at a loss

I miss the way things use to be, The way I use to feel when Nick and I were "involved" with Church

I miss having the security of knowing things were going to be ok.

I have this crazy picture in my head of how things are suppose to be and wonder if they ever will be.

I want to be back in the Lords house, I want to find A good home church.

I want to stop making excuses and just do it.

I have all these things that I want to accomplish and the procrastination is never ending, As well as the guilt

I have this immeasurable want/need to be the best provider,wife,daughter,sister,friend worker,and someday Mom

I am at A age where I guess I thought I should have it all figured out by now and reality is.. I don't

I am so thankful for Nick and him loving me for me and my crazy way and expectations

I am constantly thinking of what ifs...

I want to make a difference in this CRAZY world we live in...I want to figure out HOW?

I want to know that when I go I made A difference...

I feel the need to do EVERYTHING I can do to find A cure for this stupid thing called CF.

I want to be A better person...